When Life Smacks You Upside The Head

Just when you think life is just beginning--whether just been born, tying the knot, having kids, whatever it is--life can just unexpectantly come to an end...a sudden, ubrupt halt. A traffic jam in our lives. We can come from different kinds and types of lives that we live, but it's all too the same when everything just stops...Suddenly, things change and become much more apparent and different...It's as if life has been changed for good. A lot of us ask, "Who do we blame?" Us? Why didn't they do this right? Why couldn't they just try harder? Is it God's fault? Why did God do this? "God is to blame for this!" Those, I bet we ask...and then some.

But life can also bring and reep it's benefits. Always. I'm not going to dwell on that, really, because we've all been through those times when life goes down...We spring right back up, remembering, and hopefully, not forgetting...We learn and cope...We move on...

This brings me to what I have just recently been told by mom this morning...


This morning, I woke up around, just past 9AM, and obviously every morning my parents are awake cooking breakfast or already having breakfast, with the occasional stereo being on, with the same cd played over and over in the player, where you can hear it throughout the house. Anyways, I've just gone from upstairs from the bathroom heading down for breakfast when my mom stopped me and said, "Something happend..." Before I even opened my mouth, she kept going, "...Manang (that's Ilocano for sister/cousin, for all you non-Ilocano Filipinos out there) Gigi passed away yesterday during sugery...They couldn't stop the bleeding and she went on cardiac arrest." I was shocked. I didn't say anything...So sudden...

...I wasn't sure what to think or what to do...let alone how to feel. I mean, I do know what I feel and how I feel...it's just...it's hitting me from all sides. So unexpected. She leaves behind her husband, Jeff and their two kids...She's at least 10 years older than me, and yes, she's still young...and yet...she's passed. Another thing was that she also babysat me when I was young and so did my other half-cousins. I mean, this is hard to shake off...My half-cousin. Gone. Young; already with a family and young in marriage...

But you know...I guess this what life is. What it is about and should be. And I guess things really do happen for a reason...even if it's unexpected.

I can honestly tell you that I never had someone still young pass away all of a sudden. This is really a first for me...I mean, look at me...I'M STILL YOUNG! It just goes to show that anything can happen...Those moments in life...should be treasured and cherished. Anything can go down, can change in a blink-of-an-eye. It could sneek up on you, blindside you, come around, stalk you, ambush you...all directions...

...My eyes are wider opened; Life's fragile...maybe moreso than glass. It's given me a whole new perspective...and life shouldn't be a waste...



I ain't wasting mine...


Cherish those moments, experiences, memories, thoughts, feelings, etc., every single day...Because you never know...

Those I love and miss...I'll see you when I get there...

b. I'm alright.