Monday, December 14, 2009

An Open House To Myself. (Part IV)


Choice # 4 - Coming Clean: The Housecleaning Choice

O penly examine

>>>> and CONFESS my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust.

Beattitude #4: "Happy are the pure in heart." (Matthew 5:8)


I think this is pretty much self-explanatory regarding the fact that you and I have felt or have the impurities of an unpure heart, letting go, guilt, and confessing what we've done wrong--consciously or unconsciously. It's difficult to COME CLEAN to others and yourself. It's also true that we try to rationalize and make excuses. I've done the same...

Out of the things that I have done in the past, or even today, the present, I would always have this overwhelming feeling of GUILT inside. Part of letting go is that you have to REALIZE and NOT RATIONALIZE your guilt.

My guilt has damaged myself and others. It messed up my confidence, relationships, and at times has kept me stuck in the past. The question really is...Do I still have new guilt or leftovers from the past that are still kept in me? Quite honestly, yes.

I haven't really expressed alot of my guilt. Most of it I have, but there's some guilt that I find hard for me to let out. Whether fear or just something that's too personal. I would want to express that guilt, but I always doubt it. Even though I'm happy and my life has changed around, it's the GUILT that still gets me. But I see, with that, as an on-going process to better oneself and to realize, actualize, and analyze what's up. I try everyday to better myself, and the guilt is still something I'm working on and hopefully will get over so this hurt won't be beating me up.

Some say that you can never be too honest. Really, though, you can be too honest and it comes with a price of HURT. But that's the way it is whether you like it or not. Better to be honest than to LIE, right? Lying hurts just alot more than honesty and truth because you are made as a FOOL, and the hurt and pain are instantly greater, whereas honesty and truth, you are realizing the pain firsthand and you start to understand. I am one of those...

Constant lying has brought me nowhere but hurt, guilt, and even trouble to myself and others, making a fool of myself and towards other people. But REALIZING more of GUILT and REALIZING more about MY OWN GUILT has brought me to face guilt, altogether, head-on and letting it all out. I understand the consquences, but at least it's not never. I'm up for it...

"We are only as sick as our secrets" ; "Revealing your feelings is the beginning of healing." (James 5:16)


  • M ake time to begin your inventory
  • O pen your hearts and your mind
  • R ely on God's grace
  • A nalyze your past honestly
  • L ist both the good and bad choices and events in your life

My friend,

think of the past in terms

of those memories of events

and accomplishments

which are pleasant,

rewarding and satisfying.

The present?

Well, think of it in terms

of challenges and opportunities,

and the rewards available

for the application of

your talents and energies.

As for the future,

that is a time and place

where every worthy

ambition you possess

is within your grasp.

-Bruce Lee

The past is no more;

the future is not yet.

Nothing exists except

the here and now.

Our grand business is

not to see what lies

dimly at a distance,

but to do what lies

clearly at hand.


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